Single Mothers?

[Latina Heat]

So with being married, having a baby and thinking "what if my marriage doesn't work out?" "what if we divorce?" I come to the question of "what if I'm a single mother, who would want me?"

It's kind of a scary thought to me to be alone forever. I mean, I have my daughter so I would never be alone but love wise with a significant other. How many people who would be willing to get into a relationship with a single mother? How many people would want to have to deal with another dad and help raise a child that's not theirs?

I know for me I didn't really want to get involved with a guy/girl that had a child. I didn't vote it out completely but I always thought it would be a lot easier to not get involved with a single parent.

I know it happens all the time but for some reason thinking about myself being in that position makes me think I'd be alone forever. There are so many sick people out there and you never know who could hurt your child, I'm sure that would hold me back from letting myself be loved again.

So I guess I'm just looking for your thoughts/experiences on being a single parent and out in the dating scene again for myself or for others in that situation. Thanks.

[SuperDave71]

I think fear is the biggest factor here. You seem to be a very confident person as well as a loving mother who is will to do whatever it takes to make a relationship work. I don't care who you are, confidence is sexy. Child or no child, men have a choice.

1. Date you regardless of you having a child.
2. Don't date you.


In my book, true love is worth it in the long run. It's the talkers who choose to talk rather than act. Let actions speak louder than words.

I have no doubt that you and your daughter have nothing to worry about. Keep on smiling and keep taking those beautiful pictures of your daughter.

Let go of fear....for it serves no positive purpose.


Take care,


SuperDave71

[Insight411]

Hi Latina, I hope all is going well in your home but if not - you know we are here. Now in reference to your fears of being a single mother, i understand. However, I can safely say those are fears you can put to rest.

Single parents are not the minority....by far. From Hollywood to our everyday lives, we see it daily and trust me - no one has trouble finding dates or suitable mates. When you see a list of things written to describe a sexy woman....."without child" is no where on that list. Don't worry.

Your biggest fear should and will be making sure you don't bring the wrong type of man around your child....I don't think dating will be a problem. So if you find yourself in the single world, just be smart. Whether or not you have a child will not be on the top of the list of most mature men....now how you treat and value that child might. A great mother is not selfish, knows how to love and can teach a man about placing things in perspective. A woman that molds the life of another, juggling all that brings along and makes it look easy - that's sexy.

At one point we all had ideas of never dating anyone with kids, that didn't have money, etc. etc....but we started to grow up and life taught us reality. We slowly learn it's the heart of the woman or man....not the surface covering the heart. We were so quick to worry about the wrapping but we soon realized it's the gift inside that is important. You are an intelligent lady and if your heart matches your smile - you will be fine....and so will your daughter.

[Virgo69]

I wish all questions were as easy as yours. HA! Of course Latina, someone will “want” you. Single parents are far more attractive now than single with no kids. The better question is “will someone want me for the right reasons?”



Most importantly for single mom’s is to be cautious about their dating life. How to keep your home life private until it’s time for the new man to be introduced. By experience only, I’ve learned to keep my kids safe and not introduce them to someone I’m “just dating”. They don’t need to meet every guy I go out with and they most certainly don’t need to get attached to someone who isn’t guaranteed to stay in their life.

Dating scene is fine for single mothers… just protection your children at ALL times.

[Latina Heat]

Thanks all. I know someone will "want" me but I mean someone for the right reasons. Someone who would want to be with me for the long run. That's when I start to doubt that I'll find someone to be with.

Oh and trust me there would be no way that anyone would be meeting my daughter until it's really serious! There are just no exceptions for that.

And this isn't exactly just for me but any single mother's out there because some of my friend's have said these things to me when they were single mothers. Who knows though, if things don't work out I could be a single mother and then be dealing with these same fears.

Thank you all for your responses!

[Virgo69]

I know what you mean Latina. It's seems as though single mothers come across as easy targets to manipulate. It's a tuff world out there regardless of your home life. Things are certainly NOT the way they use to be. It's much more complicated and so many wolves pretend to be sheep. All you can do is be yourself and most importanly be cautious. It's a tuff world full of people without a conscience. I say keep your friends close and LISTEN to them when they have an opinion about him. Any guy can say what they know you want to hear. Be realistic and stay in the world of reality.