View Full Version : Gut v Heart

Mike Iglesia
02-15-2009, 07:35 PM
This letter will be as honest as I am able to because I do not ever expect to give it to you. I wanted so badly for things to work for us, but you do not love yourself. I can't expect you to love me when you do not love you. You prided yourself in being honest with me, yet when you really look at it you never were. You could not "Love" me in your current state. While I admit your feelings were intense, it wasn't love.

There were so many things in the relationship that you tried to control. I tried to adapt myself so much to your ideals that I was becoming miserable and questioning everything I liked and knew of me. I almost gave up long time friends, my activities and was suffering at work, all because I was stressing and internalizing my true feelings regarding much with us. I DO love you, and that means I can not and think I did not place any restrictions or rules on you.

I had no expectations of you EXCEPT, I desired for you to accept me as I am, put up with whatever you thought were my faults as I would put up with what I thought were yours. No couple is a perfect match., all great relationships take patience and a willingness to adjust. I am so happy that God has made me much more confident in myself, that I realized I can not change the way you are. I can only change the way I am, and I did. I was ready willing and able to do what it takes to make a HEALTHY relationship work. I have seen great growth in both of us. I learned more with you then I had in my lifetime before. I love you so much that I have to accept whatever is Gods plan and what is in my gut. I have to let you go.

I have to let you be in God's world as God intended. I can no more change you than I can change the direction the wind blows. I don't ever know what the future may hold and this close to breaking up, I am optimistic that there will be a future connection. I can not say. My gut steps in and tells me that there will not be and that it is time to move on, so I will. Standing still on hope is moving backward for people like me. You are the most beautiful, spiritual, dynamic person I have ever met. It will be hard for me to think of you with someone else. It is hard for me to not think of you hourly even now. The fact that you have broken up with me a fifth time in 2 months has made it easier, because I know the hurt lessens each day.

I can not and will not take you back again. I have to let the wound heal and not pick at the scabs. I do love you and will always care about your well being. I will wax nostalgic of you. Love leaves an indelible mark. It is time to move forward with God hugging me and holding me, carrying me through this.

02-17-2009, 08:21 AM
Wonderfully written letter,very touching.If I was to write a letter to my ex I could use a carbon copy of yours.There are so many similarities,it's uncanny.As SuperDave said in one of his posts,love her from a distance and carry on with your life.

02-18-2009, 06:36 AM
That was an amazing very heartfelt letter, you tell you have come along way in this whole roller coaster of emotions in letting go. my heart goes out to you in your journey and this is an amazing place full of healing for all of us here :)