The hook

[Cityboy88]

Well, a little over month, without fail, is a text and a call from the ex. I just ran 5 miles, and come home to my phone to see it. text reads.. "dannn are you still alive out there?" along with the call.. I WILL NOT return this call. I WILL NOT return this text. I'm NOT bitting on the fish on the line again. I've been patient, and gave so many chances, because I loved her. Ive never failed her. Ive never left her, Ive never broken a promise to her, or a word ive said. Ive always shown that I love her. No more bitting on the line. I've done all I could, and have been through too much pain. She lost me. This is a perfect example of an ex throwing out a line. I totally dipped off the face of the earth to her. I have not wrote blogs, I have not logged on to my mysapce. SO she checks it, and sees nothing but a month old log in date and my pictures. Let her look at them and see what she lost. A guy who loved her more then the world. So for all she knows, I'm dead. She doesnt deserve to know I'm alive, therefore she doesnt deserve an answer to that text. If she cared so much she wouldnt have left me hanging. Also, this is a perfect example of NC working . Just because you dip off the face of the earth, doesnt mean the ex will forget about you. IN fact , they think of you more. You stay in the their mind more if they dont know where you are, what your doing or who you are with. Stay in their mind, by NOT always being there. By NOT always answering. This proves it, as super dave said. Let this be your power to move forward. Take power BACK in your life. No more submissive crap. No more puppet play. No more waiting. Its funny, when I saw those calls and texts, my heart didnt jump!!!!! I remembered all the nasty things shes done with so many in college, and that alone made me not want to talk to her.


This was all inspired by my 5 mile run where all i focused on was my thoughts, and myself. AND.. well i was in the mall today and some very pretty girl commented on my sun glasses hanging from my coat, obviously as an excuse to talk to me. I could tell she liked me, and we spoke a bit. A random stranger. It was an ego boost. I can get female attention. And I want it. I want to meet more woman now, no going back. no looking back. I MUST keep this mentallity. Please help me keep this momentum. We;re running on almost a month and a half of NC. And it does get better. I'm sure I'll still have down days. BUT, I'll post my feeling , and pleas everyone. KEEP ME IN LINE!!!! .. thx for listening.

---------- Post added at 02:30 AM ---------- Previous post was at 02:27 AM ----------

I've also learned. that just doing nothing feels good.. No more dramatic letters Oh.. GOOD BYE WAAA> No more none of that. All it does is scream I care I care I care, I want attention ect ect. Just silence. No reason to start drama and complications. Keep it simple. For myself. Just an add on here.

[Bobbe]

Great, I'm happy for you! Maybe you should go out with some friends and celebrate! And meet more women ;)

[SuperDave71]

City,


I like what I am reading but we have heard this before. Be prepared to feel the wraith of our members if you stray. Keep that attitude and put all your actions behind it.

Good Luck!


-Your Friend,


SuperDave71

[thatdoggirl]

Actions speak louder then words so keep it up!

[OhManINeedCoffee]

Hey, Cityboy.

It's good that you want to stay in NC with your ex - I think it'll be good for you, but you're still so angry with her. I know she jerked you around, and she shouldn't have. But doing NC in anger or as revenge will not allow you to move on with your life.

Don't resent your ex for rejecting you. No matter how you felt about her, she is not, and never has been, obligated to love you back. It's a harsh truth, but it's something to bear in mind.

Keep going with NC this time - the longer you go, the more you'll be able to get some emotional distance from the situation.

[Cityboy88]

Yeah, Im not really so mad at her as I am mad at myself for bitting the line every time. For believeing in her hallow words. Geting played. every time. Im tired and bitter becase of that. I'm tired of feeling like crap fir over a year. Its enough of this girls confusion and all the crap she brings along with her

[Dan72]

WTG City, yup, actions speak louder than words my friend,.... no more of the waaaaa's!

You're a good looking dude with alot to offer, you'll meet tons of women no trouble. Just bear in mind that NC is for you, and not for her to react.

[Cityboy88]

yeah, thx man. I know, and it works!!! I never thought I would refuse meeting her or talking to her. I did and it felt good.thats Nc workin for ya

[DaDamTaDamDam]

Hi City,

you definitely made the right decision by not answering her call and stay nc. Keep up to it!!!

And please try to change your attitude about nc.

Originally Posted by Cityboy88

Also, this is a perfect example of NC working . Just because you dip off the face of the earth, doesnt mean the ex will forget about you. IN fact , they think of you more. You stay in the their mind more if they dont know where you are, what your doing or who you are with. Stay in their mind, by NOT always being there. By NOT always answering. This proves it, as super dave said. Let this be your power to move forward.

Still too much focus on your ex my friend, way too much.
You re guessing that your ex misses you and thinks about you more doesn t really show that nc is working.

NC is working when you start to NOT REALLY CARE ABOUT IF SHE IS MISSING YOU OR THINKNG ABOUT YOU!!! Do nc to get back CONTROL OVER YOU, not over her!

Let the harsh feelings towards her go so you can finally be AT PEACE with her and WITH YOURSELF!!!

We re still in the same boat my friend and I can relate to your feelings.
STAY STRONG!!!

[Cityboy88]

Its been 5 weeks since the last phone convo. Last time was OCT. 8.. 2 days since she called and texted me . For some reason I have alot of thoughts of her today. I'm still not calling or texting tho. Just posting my thoughts and feelings here so they dont fester in me. I find if i write about it, they seem to go away. Just wondering what she is up to, and kinda want to talk to her for the good conversation. I will not tho, I promise. Days like today are getting farther anf farther between, and thats a good thing. I had a dream about a past memory which sparked these thoughts of the past. Not sure what triggered the dream, but it was when I carried her on my back two miles from a park to the train station. Woke up thinking about the good days. Ok, its out of me.. on to.. day 38 of NC

[ruby09]

Good for you! You took your life back because you now know you deserve better...Bravo

[Dan72]

Well done! Keep it up!

All these thoughts/dreams are normal mate, but let them go. Don't prolong their existence by lingering over them, just let them go. Your heart is trying to work things out and heal while throwing all kinds of random crap to your head in the process. Let it do it's job and try to let your spinning head switch off to it. The more you ignore them and let them pass, the faster you'll be over her.

[myfavoriteword]

City, i hope you're doing okay today. Just wanted to tell you i'm really proud of your progress. i know it's hard but keep it up. judging from my past experience, i have a feeling that it's a lot harder than youre making it out to be in these optimistic posts. if that's the case then know that you really really will feel better soon, and you're going to mean everything you're saying a WHOLE lot more in a little more time. i can relate to the feeling of TRYING to focus on yourself but always bringing it back to the ex. soon it really will be all about you and you will feel awesome! keep it up my friend