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Wow, Mike, that was quite textbook-ish.
If this thing STILL bothers her, even if she claims it's been resolved, then you know it hasn't been resolved at all. I'm with Dan on this one - if someone cheats on me, then that's it, we're done. No negotiations. Sometimes trying to save a relationship after cheating makes things even worse than it would if you just make a clean break. We can "forgive" all we want, but we never "forget" - especially something like that. Nor should we - but in relationships, there is a difference between forgiving and moving on together and forgiving and staying right where you are.
I am not one who trusts easily or even very well (not until I'm good and ready, dammit! ), and once something has been done to completely shatter it, then there's no way I'm able to build it back.
It sounds like your friend tried to forgive and forget, but her heart was never really in it. She may have thought it was "silly" of her to continue to feel hurt about it, she may have gone along with resolving it simply for form's sake. Either way, it is clear to me that she still does not trust him. You're right, Jess - a healthy couple should never be afraid or annoyed to discuss certain problems until they're resolved; howver, they BOTH have to be honest about where they are in the healing process.
"Are tangerines really just oranges that didn't want it enough?" - Random Greeting Card