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Thread: yes and no

  1. #1

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    Default yes and no

    Ironically enough my boyfriend has a female friend here in town. They've been friends for maybe a month and met through a friend he has at his work. The thing is, she is attracted to him & he knows it. He isn't attracted to her, however. He feels that she is playing a dangerous game with her life & meets up with her sometimes in hopes of helping her. Most recently she made out with a married man, who is also her boss.

    I told him that his motives are noble, but she might be the wrong woman to be friends with. First, he might be leading her on being that he will hang out when she asks & he can. She also has some obvious male-depandancy issues because she is constantly with different men.

    I brought up some things to him that made him feel really bad & hopefully cautious. He didn't seem to see that his willingness to hang out with her could be viewed suspiciously. It was the last thing on his mind. Hopefully this means he will only hang out with her when other friends are around.

    So, guys and chicks being only friends is very good as long as one doesn't develop feelings or in the least an attraction to the other. In that case, I think if one of the people is in a relationship they should figure something out that won't make things turn to poop. Especially if they barely know eachother.

    I have guy friends that I view just & only as friends. My boyfriend has female friends who have only ever been friends (although he has exes that are still friends as well). It can happen, but "stealing" someone away isn't always noble especially after you steal them away & later you two break up badly.

  2. #2

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    You must also keep in mind, if the relationship is strong, happy and "healthy" one wont stray....A partner can not be stolen away, they have to be a willing participant..

    Trust is huge, if you cannot "trust" them why be "with" them?

    It is good you have great spoke to your partner about your concerns, he acknolwedged them even felt bad. In reading this I don't think you have to give it a second yourself stated he feels she is playing a dangerous game...which makes me think he does not agree with her actions!

    Good luck to you both!

    Last edited by Tiggerinlondon; 12-13-2008 at 02:36 AM.

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