Hello Jim and welcome here...
I'm glad you posted your question as i belive there are many other out there either facing the same problem or looking for something like that but don't have the courage to ask for guidance. I'm no expert in pornography but based on the criterias you mentioned above the best stuff i can recommend is the videos you can find on the site if you private message me.
The videos you find there available for (paid) download are in HD, are not cheaply made, no hardcore ugly stuff, all are very sensual/feelings oriented and are appropiate for both genders. I really don't think they will scare anyone and to be honest it's the best material i can think of....the rest that come to mind are all commercial 50 made in the same day same studio BS unrealistic crap you can find anywhere on the net.