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Want to move forward and stop holding on
I met this guy about 2 years ago and we hit it off really well. He seemed so interested in me at first, would call/text me constantly but I didn't want to give in right away. Well, a month or so later, I finally gave in and of course he starts pulling away telling me how he's not ready for a relationship and blah blah blah. At first, I wasn't looking for anything serious either but then developed deep feelings for him and I let him know that more than once. Every time I would ask him, "do you see us together in the long run?" his answer would be "when the time is right". He would always play this hot and cold game with me, telling me he wants to hang out but never let me know of a precise time and would later cancel. A year into it, he told me to leave him alone and move on with my life and that he would call me when he wanted to. I replied with "don't bother, one day you're going to realize what you had in front of you". Went a month with total NC and then ran into him at a friend's party, he started flirting and trying to talk to me again. Against my better judgement, I went back to hanging out with him; this time, we pretty much only hung out once a month.
About 3 months ago, I had enough of this on and off situation and wanted something lasting with him. So, after canceling on me multiple times I told him I want to meet up with him and then I'll be out of his life for good. His response, "I don't want you out of my life". When I confronted him about our future he turned cold and said that we have zero chance of being together. He said there was another girl he was serious with (note: he had lots of girls) and he had absolutely no feelings for me.
Is this guy confused about what he wants, or does he really mean what he says? I knew there were other girls but he made me feel like I was different by saying things like "I love talking to you. You're intelligent with a very kind heart", "I respect you". "You made me realize things about myself I didn't even know" and so much more. He still wanted to stay friends but of course I can't do that, at least not now; too much has happened.
Within these 3 months, I've done NC for about a month then went back to contacting him. I've been doing fairly good but just have these moments where I breakdown completely. I just don't understand how someone who says things like that and knows exactly what my feelings were can turn around and pretend that he doesn't care. I want to move on but all I seem to think about is the connection we shared and how great we were together.
Sorry for the long rant guys, just had to get it out there!