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Thread: Boyfriend help

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    Default Boyfriend help

    Hi I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. We have had problems in the past that deal with the stuff that goes on today. I wont get into that. About 5 weeks ago he makes a rule about our sex life without asking me. He says that we are not allowed to do anything sexual but vaginal. That means no oral, and no anal. I'm very hurt by this because he didnt consult with me before he made this rule. He says that he made it because I was complaining to much. The only thing I was wanting from him was to watch pornos and booty videos with me. I can't even get him to do that with me. How do I get him to stop this rule? How do I get him to watch pornos and booty videos with me?

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    thatdoggirl
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    Well, you can't make him watch porn if he doesn't want to but you can ask if he is open to doing that with you. If he's not you two will have to come up with some sort of compromise or accept each others differences. As far as him just making up his own rules and deciding only vaginal sex without tell you.. I can see how that would be hurtful and you need to talk with him about how you feel about him just deciding that without asking how you felt.

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    @ thatdoggirl He watches porn by himself, which is why I dont get why he won't watch it with me. He won't listen to me when I try to talk to him about only having vaginal sex. All he says is it is what it is.

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    Dear Anewandbetterme,

    IMHO love is made up of 6 things, caring, trust, respect, understanding, communication and a spark.

    To suggest that someone behaving in this way loves you, to me seems untrue. Please tell me why you think this person loves you? They have shown you disrespect by not consulting you on a joint decision. They are also refusing to do something with you that they will do alone, without discussion. There appears to be no communication or understanding on this or the other topic. Can you trust him, if you are just told what you have to do and you have to do it, without question? That sounds like a slave/master relationship. IME people who behave in this way crave control. Please tell us some more so we can understand, what this is all about.

    All the best,

    Annita

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