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Thread: How do I tell him I need more?

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    Default How do I tell him I need more?

    Thanks for taking the time to read this. Any help/advise is appreciated.

    I am married, and a mother of 3. My husband and I used to have a great sex life. We would openly talk about what we liked/disliked, how we "needed" each other...etc etc.

    Within the last 3 years, its all gone down hill. We have sex maybe once or twice a year? Never anything fun...just the basic "I'm horny, so come here". No foreplay (not usually anyway).

    I am a VERY sexual person. It seems like its always on my mind. Whenever I try to talk to him about it, he immediately changes the subject, and wants nothing to do with whatever I was talking about.

    I have certain fantasies, that I KNOW he would never do. Nor do I think I could ask him to do. Its to the point that I am really unhappy though. I love him, and I couldn't imagine my life without him...but I feel like this is seriously causing a problem in our marriage.

    What do I do? I have tried everything I can think of. I have tried to talk to him about it. I have tried reading books, and offering to show him. I have tried to text/chat with him so he could be more "comfortable".

    I just think its CRAZY that our biggest problem is ME wanting more sex. I am sick to death of asking/begging for sexual attention.

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    just tell him how you feel! sex is a huge part in a relationship! if he doesnt understand and doesnt want to make you happy and not willing to change that let him know your seriousely thinking about other options!

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    that sounds rough. what changed three years ago? I think usually things change but they change for reason. So what's been the thing that's happened slowly over time here? sounds like there's two things going on one is that lack of sex makes you feel unvalued, and the other is that he isn't open to your fantasies. my experience is that usually the universe is a mirror for us so my question to you is is there someway that you have been behaving in a way that's less open and less appreciative? my guess is they would actually be in another area of your life, maybe with one of your kids or a coworker etc.
    this is not really a conventional solution but I think if you worked to be more open in other areas of your life and valued others in your life more it would feedback into your world as a husband who is back to loving having sex with you and being open to your fantasies.

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