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Thread: Still living and sleeping with ex..HELP

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    Exclamation Still living and sleeping with ex..HELP

    My boyfriend and I broke up about two weeks ago. He promptly deleted me off his Facebook, started hiding his phone and said he wanted to be friends... I still live with him because I gave up my lease and quit my job to be here with him and am in a place where I know no one, I'm unemployed and have nowhere else to go since I exhausted all funds. I am about to lose what I have left because I cant pay my truck note...and bills are piling up.
    Anyway, Throughout these last two weeks we have been sleeping together off and on. At one point he told me that he was "thinking of trying again"...and of course we slept together...next day, he changed his mind. Through a series of texts he said that he was meant to be alone and that he didnt want to hurt me again and also that hes tried again with others and it didnt work.

    Meanwhile back at the ranch, we are "friends" ....and sleeping together. As I sit and watch all this I wonder where my boundaries went. He slides right back in there and I feel like I dont have any control over myself.

    He reels me in and throws me out....I have no idea how to handle having to live with him in tight quarters and let him go at the same time.

    UGH

    L

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    ltningstrike,

    Sounds like a real pickle. I feel for you. It's hard to deal with having to live with an ex. I suggest trying to focus on yourself and your life. Try to get a job and stay away from your ex as much as possible. That way the temptation to let him pull you in is less likely. Be busy and that way you can't have time for him. After all if you have been out running & come home have a shower and go to bed in the evening, you're less likely to see him and stay to chat. Similar morning scenario, get up early and get out to the library or other places and come back when you know he'll have left for work.

    If he wants to have a proper chat, reconcile, then he can let you know. Good luck.

    All the best,

    Annita
    "Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." Buddha

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    I don't think he cares either way. Outside of the bedroom he is pretty cold to me. I'm sure he would be happy if I disappeared but unfortunately I don't know my way around here very well and I know no one.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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    Dear ltningstrike,

    I would strongly suggest you focus on yourself. Find places to help you. Here in the UK we have the CAB or Citizen's Advice Bureau. They offer free advice. Usually Public Libraries and Adult Colleges have information about clubs and things. Are you registered with the housing department there? Here if you register yourself as homeless with the council, they will accommodate you as soon as they can (priority is given to the elderly and those with children). Are you getting benefits? Here you can register for job seekers allowance and that's with the Department of work and pensions (used to be Department of social services). You can help yourself, believe in yourself, reach out and ask for the help that is there in the community. Let go of people who are holding you back.

    Good luck.

    All the best,
    Annita
    "Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." Buddha

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